Forsaking Resentment

Sometimes forgive those who have wronged us is hard; sometimes it’s just complicated; and other times we are just not ready to forgive. We know someday we will, but just not yet.

But no soul can bear resentment for a long period of time.

Contrary to what we usually believe, resentment is not an emotion. Love, joy, rage, fear, are emotions. We can see evidence of this in nature. But there is not resentment in nature. The lion doesn’t resent the prey that scape.

What is Resentment?

Resentment is not an emotion, is a [very negative and useless] state of being produced as a consequence of deep emotional confusion. What triggers such confusion can vary greatly, but rock bottom always looks the same.

Some people seem to think of resentment as fuel to take action. Trying to use resentment as motivation is like putting plutonium in the gasoline tank of your car hoping to go faster. It just doesn’t work that way.

The next time you feel resentful, remember that resentment is not an emotion and is not natural. To be resentful is like to be drunk. And just like when you are drunk, little can be accomplished when you are drowning in resentment. When you are hurt, you can feel hopeless, fearful, ashamed, angry. All of these are emotions, and as emotions, you can use them to guide us slowly towards a better feeling place, but there is no way up resentment.

Being resentful is never justified. Even when you have been hurt, resent shouldn’t be your way out. I understand than when we have been knocked out of our place of bliss, we can feel negative emotions for some time, but don’t go the route of resentment. If you have been hurt and are unable to feel positive emotions, at least aim towards a concrete, defined negative emotion like anger. Angry might not be a positive feeling, but sometimes we are just too far from positive emotions and there is no use in aiming for it. We can’t go from A to C without passing thought B first. I prefer to feel angry, than to feel depressed, or hopeless. Resentment should even be an option.

Being Resentful is Being Powerless

The thing is than being resentful is not even as useful as some people believe. The fundamental belief behind accepting resentment is that we are victims, and that we do not deserve what has come to us. At the end of the day, resentment is nothing more than a different kind of whining: useless and counterproductive.

Don’t you ever accept resentment into your life. It doesn’t serve you any good and there is no need to live in resentment.